Parenting

I’ve had many non-glamours jobs over the course of my life…

• washing dishes for my neighbor’s catering company when I was in middle school
• cleaning offices at night for another neighbor’s company
• busing tables for a local bar/pub when I was 16
• folding clothes for American Eagle {probably the most ridiculous job ever!}
• stocking shelves and working the checkout lanes at various grocery stores
• janitorial work for Calvin College {this is how I met Dave — so it was worth it!}
• cleaning houses to make money for college

…and the list could go on!

But now that I’m a mom, I feel so blessed to finally have a job that I love, that doesn’t involve washing dishes, clearing tables, folding clothes, cleaning toilets, stocking pantry shelves, grocery shopping…. eerr well, never mind

All kidding aside, motherhood is definitely not the most glamours job in the world… and it’s probably the most difficult job I’ve ever had. There are even days when I’d rather be busing tables, cleaning offices, or doing pretty much anything else but working from home with my baby.

Yes, I’m sure some of you now think I’m the most horrible person in the world for wanting to clean offices instead of care for my baby… and that’s OK! I can’t change how I feel, and just because I’m somewhat overwhelmed by motherhood, doesn’t mean I love Nora any less.

In fact, I love her so much that it sometimes makes things worse. I’ve never felt such an overwhelming sense of responsibility before, I’ve never felt such a strong desire to do everything “right”; yet at the same time, I’ve never felt so helpless and unsure of what I’m supposed to do.

I’m sure I’m not only new mom out there who bawled the entire ride home from the hospital thinking… what in the world am I going to do with her when we get home. I have no idea how to do this! Don’t we need a manual, some instructions, a live-in nurse, or at the very least, someone to show us what to do?

Just knowing that Nora depends on me for everything is sometimes more than my independent spirit can handle. Yes, I’m willing to work hard, do unpleasant things, and make sacrifices. Yes I love a good challenge, but I also love my sleep… and eating with both hands!

I’ve never had a job that required constant 24/7 availability, I’ve never had a job that I felt so unqualified for, and I’ve never had a job that didn’t involve some type of training {or at least a small instruction manual}.

Yet, I’ve never had a job that mattered so much! 

I’m the type of person who likes to be good at everything I do. I’m a fast learner, I work really hard, I’m willing to do things I don’t want to do, make sacrifices, deal with difficult situations, push myself to be better… and I LOVE a challenge.

So I should excel at motherhood… right?

But for some reason, I feel like I’m barely staying afloat. I feel like I can’t do this.

I think it all boils down to the fact that for the very first time in my life, I don’t have FULL CONTROL! As much as I try {and believe me friends, I’ve tried} I can not control when she takes a nap, how long she sleeps, when she decides to go to bed at night, when she needs to eat, or when she decides to start screaming for no apparent reason at all.

Dave and I read the books, we followed the books, we took advice from so many people who have their kids on a schedule, we’ve tried this, we’ve tried that, we’ve tried everything again and again… but so far, nothing has worked.

And we REALLY want something to work! 

It’s been almost 3 months of desperately trying to get her to go to bed before 1:00am, trying to get her to take any sort of an afternoon nap, trying to calm her down during her lengthy screaming sessions EVERY. SINGLE. NIGHT… but we can’t.

Nora is definitely still the boss over at our house… and I’m pretty sure she likes it that way!

I flop into bed every night and wonder how on earth single moms and military wives do this — and don’t even get me started on teen moms. But then, every morning when I’m changing her diaper and she’s still so sleepy, she opens her eyes and she smiles. In that brief moment, I feel like eveything is going to be OK and I realize I CAN do this for another day.

But it’s still not easy.

Especially for someone like me who thrives on productivity, being “in control”, and having all my ducks in a row. Frankly, I don’t even know where half my ducks are right now… and they definitely aren’t in any type of a row!

Everyone says that Motherhood is the greatest job in the whole world — and while they are probably right, I have to wonder if the women who say that are already well past the baby-stage and have simply pushed the overwhelming, exhausted, and over-tired memories out of their brains!

Or maybe they all had perfect babies who were never colicky at night and actually took naps during the day

Motherhood is not for the weary…

And if you are a strong Type-A person like myself, it might just be one of the most difficult jobs you’ll ever have.

Good thing she’s so darn cute!

And honestly, I don’t want you to think I’m not enjoying motherhood… because I am. It’s just A LOT different and A LOT more challenging than I thought it would be!

As you can see by all the pictures, we are definitely having lots of fun with little Nora — it’s also helpful that Dave is one of the most patient, low-key, go-with-the flow people I’ve ever met {they say opposites attract right!}. He reminds me {daily} that I AM a good mom and that I CAN do this.

I can do this!

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And to all the other type-A moms out there… you can do it too!

109 comments →

I’m back! 

After being on maternity leave for almost 3 weeks, I’m back; and I have a mountain of new tips and ideas to share with you! But first, I thought I would take a few moments to share a little about Nora’s birth story, update you on the last 3 weeks of my life, and answer some of the MANY questions I’ve gotten via email, facebook, twitter, and blog comments.

Seriously – isn’t she just the cutest!

Nora’s Birth Story:

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Nora was born on Tuesday, November 22, which was 4 days after my LAST due date… so I think it goes without saying that I was more than ready for her to be born!

Dave and I woke up at 5:30am and I soon realized that my stomach was feeling a little “crampy” — and that those crampy feelings were coming about every 8 minutes. I told Dave to go to school but to be ready for me to call.

I knew Nora would be born that day! 

I quickly did a load of laundry, cleaned out the fridge, showered, finished packing the hospital bag, and tried to clean out my Inbox as much as possible!

By 9:30am the contractions were every 5 minutes and at 10:30, Dave decided to come home. It was absolutely perfect timing for Dave because he only had a half day of school on Tuesday and then the rest of the week off for Thanksgiving — so he didn’t even have to deal with sub-plans or getting behind with his grading and lesson plans!

We got to the hospital just after noon — and by that time, the contractions were getting pretty strong. It took about 45 minutes for me to dilate from a 1 to a 4 so they quickly moved me to the Labor and Delivery room around 1:00pm.

About 2.5 hours later, Nora was born! And just like that, we were a family.

{Nora at 10 days old}

Life with Baby:

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Wow — where do I start? Life with a newborn has completely rocked my world — more than I ever thought possible {feel free to say “I told you so”!}

Obviously I knew my life would never be the same {believe me, about 462 people have told me this!} I knew I would get less sleep, I knew I would be less productive, and I knew it would be a challenge… but even still, there was absolutely nothing that could have fully prepared me for being a mom!

Yes I had a bunch of meals and snacks in the freezer, yes the nursery was completely ready, yes we read a bunch of baby books, yes my Christmas decorations were up, yes I had a bunch of my Christmas shopping done… but all that planning ahead still didn’t prepare me for how totally overwhelmed I would feel when we brought Nora home on Thanksgiving Day.

The fact that this tiny baby was totally dependent on ME for everything was just so overwhelming — especially since I felt like I had absolutely no idea what I was doing.

Add in the fact that I’ve never NOT been able to schedule my days, I’ve never NOT been able to sleep through the night, and I’ve never NOT been able to “do my own thing”… and it was a recipe for a complete melt-down!

Thankfully Dave was absolutely wonderful. He put up with my tears and continued to reassure me that I was doing a great job. Our families have also been really supportive by making meals, inviting us over for dinner, watching Nora for a few hours, and even staying the night once so we could sleep. Without them, I’m not sure I would have made it.

The last week has been much better, Nora is sleeping more at night, she’s growing and gaining weight so I’m not as worried about how much she’s eating, and I’m slowing feeling like my days have more of a schedule… which I so desperately need.

Praise the Lord!  

I know we still have a long road ahead of us, and I’m hoping things will only get easier as we start to develop more of a routine and get used to living with a baby; but for now, I’m just happy that Nora is healthy and happy {for the most part!}

Q & A’s:

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As you can imagine, I’ve gotten lots of questions already — so I’ll answer a few of the most common ones below.

What was the worst part of your labor?

Definitely the contractions! My labor went so quickly that I never had time for an epidural… so I felt all the contractions. I have a pretty high pain tolerance, but by the time I started pushing, the pain level was close to a 9 or 10 for sure!

What were you most surprised about during labor?

When my water broke. I was always so worried that I wouldn’t know when my water broke and every time I felt a drop of wetness I would think — could that have been my water breaking? However, when my water did break {like 10 seconds before I started pushing} it was SO much water! I kept thinking, what if that had happened at church or in the mall, or in our bed at home! 

Also, I was surprised and how little pain I had during the actual delivery. Everything I was told made it sound so extremely painful but I honestly only felt pressure… no real pain.

{brand new — only one day old}

Where you instantly in love?

Honestly, I don’t really even remember what I was thinking or feeling when they put Nora on my stomach after she was born. I remember thinking: how on earth was she inside me? and then thinking: she’s mine… she’s perfect… but what should I do now?

Later that evening when Dave and I were talking, he asked me if I felt like a mom yet, and I said “not really”. It was still so surreal; and although I’m totally smitten now, I honestly would not say that I was “instantly in love”.

What do you remember most about your labor?

Like I mentioned earlier, it was just so quick — but I definitely remember the feeling when the doctor said, “one more push and you’ll be parents”. I pushed and literally felt my stomach “deflate” and all of a sudden there was no pressure any more.

Also, Dave got to cut the cord so I’m sure that’s something he’ll remember forever.

How was your hospital stay?

It was amazing. We delivered at St. Mary’s Hospital and were SO impressed with their staff, nurses, doctors, and facilities. I’ve never been a hospital patient before so I didn’t know what to expect, but we were pleasantly surprised. We even celebrated our first family Thanksgiving in our hospital room — and actually had a really good Thanksgiving dinner, complete with pumpkin pie!

Why didn’t you let your sister be your nurse?

One of my sisters is actually a Labor and Delivery nurse at St. Mary’s hospital so while she was definitely around during our hospital stay, she was not my nurse. I know a lot of people thought that was crazy, but I just didn’t want my sister to be my nurse. I wanted her to be a sister and an aunt… and I’m happy with that decision.

What is the best part about being a mom?

When she smiles!

What is the most overwhelming part about being a mom?

Oh boy, where do I start! Probably the fact that this little girl depends on me for everything. The lack of a daily schedule is also extremely overwhelming for me… and while we are starting to see sleeping/eating patterns, it’s still nothing like my pre-baby ultra-structured days!

How are the international students doing:

I don’t think they are really that interested in the baby — which is fine. We talked with them a lot before Nora was born and made it VERY clear that we did not expect them to babysit or be responsible for her in any way. We also said that they were welcome to hold her if they wanted to, but they didn’t have to.

The girls say they can’t hear Nora crying at night, which is good — no sense in all 5 of us being up!

How is Dave doing?

He’s a natural… honestly! He’s so patient {both with Nora and with me} and SO helpful. I know he’s tired too, but he’s always so excited to hold Nora when he gets home from school — even if she is crying and a little cranky.

So that’s it for now. Our lives are just a little different than they were a few weeks ago, and while I do miss my schedules and crossed off lists, I think I’ll be able to adjust.

Plus, she’s just so darn cute — a keeper for sure

Thanks to my friend Jodi for the amazing newborn photos! And thanks to all the amazing moms who wrote guests post for me while I was on maternity leave. Such great motherly advice!

19 comments →

Due to the recent birth of our beautiful baby girl, Nora Faith, I’ve rounded up an All-Star list of moms who effortlessly seem to manage work, home, family, life, and everything in between! You can read all their words of motherly wisdom here, as well as how they manage to “do it all” while still living a life they love.

I’ll be sharing my own thoughts and baby updates soon enough, but right now, I’m simply soaking up their trusted advice while cuddling with my new baby girl! 

The following is written by Jill from The Diaper Diaries:

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When I married my husband, I must admit, I was anxious to add to our family. I have always been a “kid” person and had wanted to be a mom for as long as I can remember. My husband, on the other hand, had never really spent a ton of time around kids; and although he wanted kids, wasn’t in as much of a hurry.

Looking back I am so grateful for the two years we were married before we had our daughter. I have so many wonderful memories of the time when our family was just the two of us. And I think it set a strong foundation for our marriage.

And then there were three.

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I distinctly remember the feelings I had after Lily was born — my heart hadn’t just stretched to make room for HER, but I also loved my husband more deeply than before. Watching him embrace fatherhood and fall in love with his daughter brought out intense feelings in me.

But it’s amazing how time goes on, the dishes piled up, we got low on sleep, had more kids, more responsibilities, more commitments, and those intense feelings began to fade.

And if I am completely honest, those kids can steal bigger and bigger pieces of my heart.

Do you know what is the MOST important gift you can give your kids?

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It isn’t the top stroller, or the right swaddle method (although that can be a life saver) or even the proper sleep schedule. It is a strong relationship between their mom and dad. And the only way to do that is to do exactly opposite of what is natural to do.

It isn’t hard to put your kids first once you have them. They make it VERY clear when they need something. And if you don’t jump the second they make that clear, they will make it even clearer!

Our husbands are often more subtle. And surely, as grown men, they don’t need us near as much as these children that are helpless without us. But I assure you, your husband needs you too. And he will hopefully be there long after your kids gone.

Take off your mom hat from time to time and put on your wife hat!

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Get away without the kids even when they stand by the door and beg you to stay home. Don’t just throw the kids at your husband when he gets home and run (guilty!!), but greet him with a kiss.

The treasures of raising children are truly priceless; but if we are doing it at the cost of our marriage, the whole family loses. So make sure you continue to invest in your marriage and I promise, it will pay dividends far into the future.

When was the last time you wore your “wife hat”?

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Jill is the author of The Diaper Diaries. She has been changing diapers for 6+ years as a stay at home mom of three children. She also has a devoted husband who graciously puts up with this little internet hobby. They all probably wish she would exercise a bit more discretion as she shares their life’s ups, downs and in-betweens with anyone willing to read it. You can (almost always) find her on Twitter @DiaperDiaries.

3 comments →

Due to the recent birth of our beautiful baby girl, Nora Faith, I’ve rounded up an All-Star list of moms who effortlessly seem to manage work, home, family, life, and everything in between! You can read all their words of motherly wisdom here, as well as how they manage to “do it all” while still living a life they love.

I’ll be sharing my own thoughts and baby updates soon enough, but right now, I’m simply soaking up their trusted advice while cuddling with my new baby girl! 

The following is written by Aby from Simplify 101:

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Six weeks before my first baby’s due date, I thought I had everything under control. My baby shower was scheduled for the next Saturday, and I had a checklist and time-line in place for all the other remaining baby preparations.

What I didn’t realize was that the very next day my water would break.

I was scrubbing baseboards when I felt a little trickle — a little trickle that lead to an “oh no,” a tear-filled phone call to the doctor, and a panicked trip to the ER. (And no, my bag wasn’t packed yet.)

After five days on bed rest in the hospital, my doctor told me that my baby was on the way — Friday, November 13. He arrived five weeks early (the day before my baby shower) but he was a healthy baby boy — and that was the only thing that mattered.

Two days later, my husband and I brought baby Collin to his not-yet-ready home. This was when I learned my first lesson in parenting:  You are no longer in control! Another person now rules your home, your schedule, and your heart.

I don’t have any tips for dealing with the heart part (though I promise, you will get used to it soon enough.) But, thirteen years later, I have some ideas to help you stay organized while someone else rules your home and your schedule.

Tip 1:  Sleep when baby sleeps.

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It’s much easier to stay organized and keep up with the rest of your life when you’re well rested. So in the early days sleep when your baby sleeps.

In time, your baby will learn to sleep on your schedule, but until then, make sure you get plenty of rest by napping when baby naps. (You won’t have this luxury with baby number two, so enjoy it with baby number one.)

Tip 2: Ask for help.

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You’re not going to be able to do everything you did before you had a baby. Even though your baby will sleep a lot, he or she will take a lot of your time and energy. If you’re not one to ask for help, start practicing before baby arrives.

I had to learn how to ask for help while I was on bed rest in the hospital waiting for Collin to arrive. My friend Michelle helped me out by sewing sheets to fit the antique bassinet Collin was going to sleep in his first weeks at home. (This was one of those lingering items on my to-do list that didn’t get done before my water broke.) But thanks to Michelle’s help, baby Collin had a warm and cozy place to sleep his first weeks at home.

Tip 3:  Seek out shortcuts whenever you can.

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Shortcuts are a new mom’s best friend, so always be on the lookout for little ways you can save time. For example, you’ll be amazed at how much laundry one little bitty baby will create. Instead of folding your baby’s onesies, stack them in a pile and place them right in the dresser drawer.

Use just one style and color of baby socks, so you don’t have to spend time matching socks. Instead, simply drop all the socks into a basket (right next to that little stack of onesies.)

Tip 4:  Use containers and curtains to conceal baby clutter.

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Babies can also create a lot of clutter. There’s just so much stuff to care for one little person! Don’t stress about the clutter, conceal it! Corral little items like stuffed animals and rattles into small containers like metal buckets or baskets. Add a curtain to the front of your changing table to conceal less than perfect stacks of diapers, wipes and other changing necessities.

Tip 5: Enjoy every moment of it!

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These baby days are going to fly by. And you will miss them when they’re gone. So don’t worry about the clutter or the laundry or anything else. Instead, hold that baby just a little bit longer and enjoy every single minute of being a new Mom. Everything else can wait. (You’ll just have to trust me on that one.)

What tips would you add to this list?

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Aby Garvey is an organizing expert who believes organizing can be creative and fun—the more you love an organizing solution the more likely you are to use it! She is the co-owner of Simplify 101, a professional organizing business that specializes in online organizing workshops. Aby helps people around the world get organized via her online workshops and one-on-one coaching services.

1 comment →

Due to the recent birth of our beautiful baby girl, Nora Faith, I’ve rounded up an All-Star list of moms who effortlessly seem to manage work, home, family, life, and everything in between! You can read all their words of motherly wisdom here, as well as how they manage to “do it all” while still living a life they love.

I’ll be sharing my own thoughts and baby updates soon enough, but right now, I’m simply soaking up their trusted advice while cuddling with my new baby girl! 

The following is written by Amy from The Finer Things In Life:

Congratulations to Andrea on the birth of her sweet baby!

Knowing Andrea and her diligence and careful preparation, there may not be much about pregnancy or birth that surprised her, but some of you may be in the throes of your first pregnancy, or may be reading this with your sweet baby snuggled on your chest, thinking Why Didn’t Anyone Tell Me? about one thing or another.

During my fourth pregnancy I put together a series answering some of those questions. I hope it’s a help to you or another new mom you know!

Why Didn’t Anyone Tell Me?

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…that wanting to conceive a baby doesn’t always result in actually conceiving a baby?

Infertility is heart-wrenching, and often unexplained, but there is certainly hope. After a three-year trial with our own infertility, my four children are proof.

… that how I treat my body during pregnancy matters?

No, I shouldn’t eat whatever I want. Yes, my weight does matter for the health of my baby and myself.

… that pregnancy is uncomfortable!

The aches, the pains, the hemorrhoids! It’s not all bad, and most discomforts have a somewhat effective solution.

… that I would desperately want to stay home with my baby, and that (in most situations) it can be done!

Going from two incomes to one is a tough decision, and with it comes many sacrifices and lifestyle changes, but with determination and creativity, it often is a healthy choice for the family.

… that I have birthing options.

That I don’t have to follow the status quo, which often leads down a slippery slope That I need to educate myself and be an advocate for my own healthy birth.

… that checks down there are often unnecessary and rarely helpful.

Yes, really!

… that I can have a healthy, natural birth in a hospital.

Just because you elect to birth in a hospital doesn’t mean you have to have a lot of medical intervention. Prepare yourself!

… that breastfeeding would be so difficult.

But so very right for my baby and rewarding for me. Obstacles are common, especially for first-time moms, but they can be overcome!

It’s endless, right?

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The questions, the concerns, the Why Didn’t Anyone Tell Me?

You know what else is endless? The love. The snuggles. The joy. Pregnancy is such a gift.

Babies are the most incredible of blessings. It’s good to be informed. It’s important to be an advocate and do our very best for our little ones. In the end, though, just enjoy. Love. You’re a fabulous Mama!

What do you wish someone had told you before you had a baby?

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After teaching sixth grade for eight years, Amy traded the chalkboard and classroom germs for dirty diapers and the joys of living on one income. When she’s not nursing a baby or fixing Saturday morning breakfast for her husband’s football team, Amy’s blogging about Embracing the Extraordinary in Every Day over at The Finer Things in Life.

2 comments →

Due to the recent birth of our beautiful baby girl, Nora Faith, I’ve rounded up an All-Star list of moms who effortlessly seem to manage work, home, family, life, and everything in between! You can read all their words of motherly wisdom here, as well as how they manage to “do it all” while still living a life they love.

I’ll be sharing my own thoughts and baby updates soon enough, but right now, I’m simply soaking up their trusted advice while cuddling with my new baby girl! 

The following is written by Amanda from OhAmanda.com and Impress Your Kids:

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The first few minutes after my daughter was born, the nurses said, “I don’t think those 3 know anyone else exists in the world.” We were absolutely head over heels with our little girl. It was the most amazing, heart-opening experience of my life.

Little did I know how much she would rock my world!

It’s like that saying, “to have a child is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body”. What that quote does not say is that to have a child is also to decide to forever and ever NEVER get enough sleep again!

When I was pregnant with my daughter, I was determined to read everything I could about sleep patterns and techniques for babies — I wanted my sleep!

How to get your child to sleep can be one of those highly debated mothering choices. But I think there is at least one thing ALL parents can agree on: children NEED sleep!

In fact, kids need a lot more sleep than you think! Archibald Hart, author of Sleep, It Does a Family Good: How Busy Families Can Overcome Sleep Deprivation says babies under 1 should have 14-15 hours of sleep per day! And 6-12 year old kids should still be getting 10-11 hours!

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I have done everything from cry-it-out, to no-cry, to a little bit of co-sleeping. Here are some of the best things I learned as a jealous-of-her-sleep mama of two:

1. Sleep Begets Sleep

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I learned this from Dr. Weissbluth, pediatrician and author of Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. The more good sleep babies get, the better they are going to sleep.

Over tired children (for some unknown reason) do not sleep well! I remember when my daughter was very little, if she stayed up way past her bedtime (usually because of some crazy grandparent adventure) she would always wake up early the next morning! And if I put her to bed early (which I often did when my husband was out of town), she’d sleep later the next morning! Seems backwards, doesn’t it?

2. Protect Nap and Bedtimes

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Bedtime and nap time are connected. When you protect nap time, your bedtimes will go smoother. When bedtimes are consistent, nap times will be easier!

With a newborn, it is easy to get into the she’ll-fall-asleep-in-the-carseat, but if you want your kids to enter that full, deep, restorative sleep that will effect their entire day, you need real naps and real sleep!

Ironically, I was so intent on getting my kids to sleep in their beds at naps and bedtimes, that it was hard for them to fall asleep anywhere else!

3. Do Not Wake a Sleeping Baby

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My son is three years old and it still pains me to wake him early from a nap! The only time waking a child up is a good idea is if they are mixing up their days and nights or if you are trying to protect night-time sleep. For example, if my son takes a late nap and is sleeping at 5pm, I will wake him to protect his 7pm bedtime!

4. Implement Early Bedtimes

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Children and babies are ready for bed BEFORE they start showing signs of sleepiness. When your baby rubs his eyes, yawns, or is cranky, you have (sadly) already missed their perfect bedtime! Go ahead and start the bath, the blanket, the story and the bedtime routine before those sleepy cues! Let your baby fall asleep in a nice drowsy state, not a crying-I’m-overly-tired scream-fest!

Plus, it’s nice to have some adult time early in the evening when your kids go to sleep. My daughter is in kindergarten and still goes to bed at 7pm!

These are just general guidelines and simple tips to help you and your baby keep sleep a priority! It seems like a simple thing, but it’s surprising how something like baby’s bedtime becomes a big deal in your life. I’m no expert, but I do know that a good night’s sleep helps my kids’ behavior. And when I get more sleep, I’m a little better behaved, too!

What are your thoughts on kids and sleep?

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Amanda is a stay-at-home mom of two who blogs at OhAmanda.com and Impress Your Kids. In her former life, Amanda was a Children’s Pastor — overseeing, organizing and developing ministry for kids in nursery through middle school, but now that she is a mom, her “skills” are used up on her kids!

14 comments →

Due to the recent birth of our beautiful baby girl, Nora Faith, I’ve rounded up an All-Star list of moms who effortlessly seem to manage work, home, family, life, and everything in between! You can read all their words of motherly wisdom here, as well as how they manage to “do it all” while still living a life they love.

I’ll be sharing my own thoughts and baby updates soon enough, but right now, I’m simply soaking up their trusted advice while cuddling with my new baby girl! 

The following is written by Kim from Art of Domestic Living:

I had heard about the baby blues, and I had likely seen a special on Oprah or some other talk show, but I didn’t give it much attention. For the most part, I felt like I was an average woman who experienced “minor” PMS symptoms, and for the most part, was able to keep my emotions intact.

But this all changed once my daughter was born.

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Actually it started about nine months before she was born, before I even knew I was pregnant!

A few days before I suspected that I might be pregnant, I was at our neighborhood home improvement store, buying some lumber for a window treatment. A sales clerk helped me fit the long piece of wood into my Honda Civic. It was a rather long piece of wood, so it had to be strategically placed from my front windshield diagonally through the trunk.

I drove about two yards when the windshield decided to crack from the pressure of the wood. I went into the store to see if they could do anything. I talked with the manager, but because I had driven a couple of yards, they were not responsible.

I started crying and then I called my husband and I cried some more. Shortly after that I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. I told my husband and his response was, “I guessed it after you broke down at the store.”

Fast forward nine months.

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I’m lying in the hospital bed getting ready to bring my newborn home from the hospital. My husband calls to tell me he can’t figure out how to get the car seat strapped into our car. (We had just bought a new car and didn’t have time to get the car seat attached.)

After that phone conversation, I was crying to the nurse and telling her I didn’t think I would be able to bring my daughter home. She assured me that I would be taking her home!

Back at home.

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We did make it home from the hospital and everything seemed to be going just fine. My parents were visiting from Pennsylvania and my husband was enjoying his last day of summer vacation before heading back to school (he is a teacher).

However, my daughter decided she didn’t want to sleep during the evening hours, which meant I wasn’t sleeping and my husband wasn’t sleeping. It was a very frustrating evening with our newborn. I was worried about my husband because his first day of school was the next morning and he got very little sleep. In addition my parents were planning on heading back to PA and I was going to be alone with this child for the first time!

My husband knew I wasn’t doing very well and begged my parents to stay another day. Thankfully they did! But every time I looked at my Dad, I started to cry. I just couldn’t look at him without becoming a crying mess.

Finally my husband was home from school and I thought I could handle things, until the doorbell rang. A friend dropped by to see our baby and bring a gift. I walked to the door, opened it, turned around and went to my room to cry. I didn’t say a word. I’m so thankful my family was able to cover for me and my actions.

My husband sums it up the best, “I never believed in the post partum baby blues until I saw it first hand!”

Thankfully the emotions didn’t last that long and two beautiful daughters later, we are able to enjoy many laughs about my “crazy days”!

But believe me, they DID happen and they WERE real!

Please be real and honest with those around you!

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Having the “blues” could be a very real part of any woman’s post-pregnancy.

When your doctor asks if you have been “feeling down” tell him or her the truth! They are there to help you! You need to take care of yourself first, so you are able to take care of your newborn!

Did you deal with Post Partum Depression or Baby Blues?

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Kim Brinks married to her wonderful husband, a mother of two darling elementary age girls, AND a part-time teacher.She enjoys cooking and taking care of her home — all of which she blog about over at Art of Domestic Living.

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